Teaching Tenderness Read online

  “Hey guys, did you save me any?” I asked as I walked up to the duo and sat down at the table with them.

  Jackson stared at me with a chocolate grin and shook his head. “Nope, this is all mine. Anthony said so.”

  “Anthony?” I asked with a quirk of my eyebrow. “Don’t you mean Mr. A?”

  “Nope, he’s correct. We have a deal. He’s allowed to call me Anthony when it’s not school hours and Mr. A when we are in class. Isn’t that right, Cracker Jacks?”

  “That’s right. And he’s allowed to call me Jacks because he’s letting me call him Anthony.”

  I laughed and felt my heart warm. “Well, as long as Anthony is okay with it.”

  I reached out to muss his hair and then stopped. I typically wasn’t much for public displays, but seeing how Anthony still sat there holding my sons hand, I realized I wanted to do the same thing. And Anthony, as shrewd as ever, noticed my hesitation and leaned toward me.

  “It’s okay to be affectionate with your child. He won’t mind, and sometimes he really needs it,” he whispered, and I felt his lips graze my ear.

  An involuntary shiver ran down my spine, and I jerked at the alien feeling. I had never had this reaction to anyone before. I’d only ever been with women and never looked in another man’s direction except to shake their hand. So what the hell was happening to me? Why was Anthony making me feel things that I shouldn’t be feeling? I’d always been a man who was undoubtedly straight.

  The man in question reached out to touch my shoulder, and I jumped at the gesture. “Hey, are you okay? You’re looking a little ghostly there, dude. Do you need something to eat?”

  “I-I’m fine. Just a lot on my mind,” I squeaked out. “C-can we talk about all of this,” I made a wild motion with my hand, “later?”

  Anthony nodded. “Sure. Drop me at my car when we leave here, and I can just follow you two to your house.”

  “Anthony is coming for dinner, again? That’s sweet!” Jackson said enthusiastically as he attacked his waffle cone.

  ****

  “So, you really don’t mind continuing to tutor Jackson?” I asked Anthony much later.

  It was after dinner and Jackson was begrudgingly in the shower. He would have much rather been with the adults in the living room. But Anthony had pointed out with a wink that it was boring grown up talk, and he was positive that I wouldn’t mind him staying up for an extra few minutes to play his game. Especially since he was so well behaved at the doctor.

  I reluctantly agreed, because let’s be honest, who could turn down Anthony’s wink? And after offering Anthony a glass of wine and pouring some for myself, we were seated on my couch. We were closer than I would have liked, since I was having such crazy feelings, and discussed what had happened at the doctor.

  “Look…” Anthony said and drained his glass before setting it down on the coffee table. “First, I wanted to say how sorry I am for overstepping my bounds at the doctor. It was very rude and unprofessional of me. You had brought me there to be moral support for both you and Jackson, and instead I acted like a dick.”

  I copied his motions by draining my own glass, and I felt the wine swirl through my veins and go straight to my head. “No, I really appreciate what you did. You were way more supportive to us than you realize. Dr. Stinebeck was a jerk and very disrespectful to you by disregarding what you have already done with Jackson. And I am grateful you got him out of there.”

  Now I’m not sure what compelled me, maybe it was the wine, but as soon as I said those words, I reached over and rested my hand on Anthony’s knee. It was the boldest move I had ever made considering I didn’t even know if he liked me. Hell, I didn’t even know if I liked men. But there my hand was, resting on that damn knee of his. And since when did I find knees sexy? I was in way over my head.

  Anthony cleared his throat. “Marcus, there’s uh, there’s something I need to tell you before I continue tutoring Jackson. Something I don’t really tell the parents of my students, but I feel like you should know.”

  I stared at him curiously, and Anthony shifted away from me so my hand fell limply on the couch. “Okay. What’s going on?”

  “I’m gay,” he blurted.

  Well that wasn’t what I was expecting. And I sure as hell wasn’t expecting the relief that flooded my body and made me feel warm from the inside out. But damn, I was sure glad he told me.

  “Oh,” I breathed out.

  “Is—” He cleared his throat and licked his plump bottom lip. “Is that okay with you? I just don’t want my sexuality to get in the way of my working with Jackson.”

  “No, it’s perfectly fine.” I rushed to reassure him. “It’s more than fine, actually.”

  “Really?” Anthony said and his voice lowered to a husky timbre. Wow, these thoughts were nuts. Why was my body reacting this way to him? “And why’s that?”

  I glanced down at my lap as a way of answering him, and his gaze zeroed in on the tenting of my pants. “Apparently I’m into dudes, too,” I tried my hand at joking and failed—miserably.

  “Dudes?” he asked “As in plural?” His body swayed closer to me.

  “Well, just one dude so far,” I leaned in toward him.

  “Oh yeah? Who’s that?” he asked and licked that damn lip again.

  “Oh, just some english teacher. I’m having very mixed feelings and hoping that maybe he could give me a lesson or two on what to do next.” I couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.

  Everything inside my brain was screaming for me to abort! Abort! Abort! But I couldn’t. My body physically wouldn’t let me. It wanted and needed to do this. I couldn’t fight it if I tried. And honestly, I didn’t even want to.

  Anthony laughed a throaty laugh and leaned in until his lips hovered over mine. “I think I know just the man for the job,” he said right before he crushed his lips against mine. And the minute they touched, I was a goner.

  Chapter 14

  Anthony

  What the fuck was I doing? I had no business kissing Marcus Anderson. Not only was he my student’s father, he was also straight. He preferred vagina over dick. He liked innies not outies. So why in the hell was I currently sitting there on his couch with my lips pressed against his? But damn it, when he looked at me with those chocolate colored eyes just daring me to kiss him, I had to comply.

  But this was wrong. He was obviously confused about his sexuality, and I was the only gay man he felt comfortable enough around to take things out for a test drive. So why did he look at you that way before you told him you were gay? My subconscious felt the need to remind me of that little piece of information. It was true. While we were sitting there drinking some wine, before I blurted out that I was gay, I thought I’d notice the spark of interest in his eyes. But I shrugged it off as the wine going to his head. But clearly it went south as well, if the bulge in his pants was any indication.

  I needed to stop. I needed to pull away and end this now. But I couldn’t. Not when his lips felt so soft under my own. And definitely not when he reached a tentative hand out and gripped the collar of my shirt to pull me closer. And how the hell could I stop when I heard him groan and felt the timid swipe of his tongue? But I knew this wasn’t right. So as much as it killed me, I had to pull away.

  Marcus chased my lips when I leaned back, and I had to put a hand on his hard chest to stop him. On his rock hard chest. Fuck, it really sucked doing the right thing sometimes.

  “What’s the matter? Did I do something wrong?” he asked breathlessly.

  I took in his blown pupils and slightly swollen lips and shook my head. “No, not at all. In fact, you did everything right.”

  “Then why did you stop?” he asked and frowned in confusion.

  “Because this isn’t right. Clearly, you’ve never messed with a man before, and I don’t want you to wake up in the morning with any regrets.”

  “Why do you think I’ll regret it?” he asked curtly. The last thing I wanted to do wa
s piss him off.

  “Just speaking from experience,” I said in a rush and jumped up from the couch. I had to get out of there. “I need to go. Please tell Jackson goodnight for me, and I’ll see him tomorrow.”

  “Anthony, wait,” Marcus called out, but I was already out the door.

  I needed a drink. A stiff one at that. So instead of heading home, I drove straight to my favorite hole in the wall. I marched right inside like I owned the place, plopped my ass down on my usual stool, and ordered a shot of tequila. Then another one.

  I was a few tequilas in and starting to feel it when I felt a man sit beside me.

  “I see you’ve returned. Ready for another go round?” Sebastian askedwith the purr in his voice that used to turn me on.

  “What do you want?” I asked with a sneer.

  “Isn’t that obvious?” he asked and placed his hand on my thigh.

  “I’ve told you, I’m not interested. Our last hook up was our last hook up. Move on, dude,” I said and removed his hand from my body.

  “Tony.” He tried to use his most enticing voice and looked at me with heavy eyes as he latched on to my hand. “Come on, baby. How many times do I have to tell you I’m sorry? It was a mistake.”

  “For fuck’s sake, dude, how many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?” Fuck, he was relentless. I sighed and stood up from where I was seated and ran my hand through my dark hair. “Look, Sebastian, I forgave you a long time ago.” I held up my hand to stop him when he opened his mouth to speak. “But that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten it. I don’t want to be with you again. Not now, and not ever. Leave me the fuck alone, and go find someone’s ass to pound.”

  I was so fucking frustrated as I called for a cab and waited for it to take me home. Not only was I sexually frustrated from that kiss with Marcus, but I had to run into my ex while downing shots of tequila. Talk about a fucking buzzkill. I hoped the next day went smoothly and that there wasn’t any awkwardness when Marcus picked Jackson up from school.

  “Looks like it’s just me and you tonight, buddy,” I told my right hand with a sigh as I laid in bed. Well, at least my hand was loyal and didn’t cheat or have any confusion about its sexual orientation.

  ****

  School went as expected. The kids were required to turn in their book reports, and since I didn’t feel up to teaching, I decided to pop in a movie. It was Friday, the reports were going to be tedious to grade, and I was still in a pissed off mood from the night before. Not to mention I had to leave earlier than usual, so I could pick up my car from the bar. So why not watch a movie? It was a win, win situation for everyone.

  It was while I was seated behind my desk that the email came. Without even looking at it, I just had a feeling I knew who it was from. I braced myself and clicked open the email program and saw the return address. MAnderson had sent me an email.

  I hovered the mouse over the delete option for a few seconds, but I knew I needed to just open the damn thing. It could be important regarding Jackson and nothing to do with the night before.

  Anthony,

  We need to talk. Can we please do so when I pick Jackson up from school?

  Marcus

  I rolled my eyes at the email and hit the reply option.

  Dude,

  Again you’re killing me with the formality. You really need to lighten up a bit. And sure, we can chat when you come to collect your offspring. You know where to find us. Room 214 at the end of the hall, on the right hand side. You know, in case you forgot. Or maybe you can ask Miss Kathy for directions. I’m sure she’d love to help you out.

  Later man

  I grinned as I sent the response to him. Suddenly I wished I could be a fly on the wall of his office as he read it. But what did he expect? I spoke snark like a second language.

  Seriously? You’re going to bring her up? Jackson has already informed me that she has our china pattern picked out. Maybe I could set her up with you instead. She seems extremely eager to pick Jackson up from school, and I don’t think it has anything to do with doing me a favor.

  My eyes bugged out from his response. Was he actually joking with me and speaking his own bit of sarcasm?

  Stranger things have happened. Like for instance, you responding in sarcasm is a miracle. I was bracing myself for another email that read like an instruction manual. Anyway, I would deem trying to set us up useless considering she has the wrong… equipment for me. And on that note I need to go stop this movie before the class falls asleep. See you this afternoon.

  My computer didn’t ding to alert me of a response, and I knew that he wasn’t going to. I looked over at the stack of book reports and decided to try and get a head start on them. Half of the class was asleep while the others engaged in hushed conversations or god knew what else. As long as they weren’t bothering me, I couldn’t give a shit less what they did. So I grabbed the first book report and opened it up to start reading. I was four reports in when the bell rang. Thank god because I was damn near ready to climb up on my desk and fall asleep like most of the class.

  The rest of the day went by in much the same way. The kids watched a movie and I graded more book reports. By the time the day was over, I was halfway through the stack, which would free up more of my weekend for me. I had plans to go camping before winter weather set in, and I didn’t want to spend my time there reading fucking book reports.

  “So what’re you doing this weekend?” Jackson asked me while we worked through the week’s spelling words.

  “I’m going camping,” I answered cheerfully as I pointed to the next word.

  “That sounds fun. I’ve never been,” he said. He sounded pretty bummed about it.

  “It’s really fun. Maybe your dad can take you some time.”

  Jackson focused on sounding out the next word, and once he nailed it, I had him repeat it until he could say it with more confidence. “Yeah right. He wouldn’t dare spend time away from his phone or computer.”

  “Well, that’s too bad. I think you’d have a great time,” I replied and pointed out the next word.

  For the next hour that was our rhythm. He’d sound out a word until he could recite it with confidence, and then we’d have a small conversation. That way it broke up the tedious lesson and didn’t make it seem like he was doing more work. I knew that made the process longer than necessary, but it worked for Jackson, and I didn’t mind that it prolonged things.

  “Can I come with you?” Jackson asked softly, his voice full of hope.

  “Come with you where?” Marcus asked from the doorway.

  “Camping,” Jackson answered him as he started to gather his belongings.

  “Oh, buddy, I don’t think that’s appropriate since he’s your teacher. Besides if you want to go camping, I could always take you.”

  Jackson’s face fell, and I watched him blink back tears furiously. “Yeah right, Dad. You’re always too busy.”

  “Jackson, that’s not true. We could get some camping gear and go next weekend if you want,” Marcus offered as he walked farther into the classroom.

  “Really?” Jackson asked, but I could tell he was trying hard not to get his hopes up.

  “Really,” Marcus replied. “Where do you go camping?”

  Shit. I knew that was coming, and I was going to have break Jackson’s heart. “Horseshoe Lake. But unfortunately, all their slots are full since it’s fall break. That’s why I have to go this weekend if I want to go.”

  “Oh, maybe I can find somewhere else for us to go. I’ll look online when I get home.”

  Marcus grimaced when Jackson hung his head and put his backpack on his shoulder. “It’s fine, dad. We’ll just find something else to do. See you Monday, Mr. A. Have fun camping.”

  Don’t let Jackson get to you. Don’t let Jackson get to you. Don’t let Jackson get to you. Fuck it, he got to me. And before I could take the words back, I found myself extending the damn offer.

  “Wait, the campsite I reserved is big enough.
Why don’t you guys come with me this weekend, and we can share the site.” Damn, the kid was good at getting to me.

  Chapter 15

  Marcus

  I don’t know who was more surprised, Anthony for extending the invitation or me for accepting it. But either way, I found myself a few hours later shooting down the interstate to drive the forty-five miles to Horseshoe Lake. And not only that, but the car was loaded down with every piece of camping equipment I could buy. I had no clue what was needed when I stepped into the store, but the salesman was more than happy to help me pick things out to ensure I had the “most pleasant camping experience possible”. I really hoped that was the case.

  “I see you guys found the place okay,” Anthony called out to us when I pulled my car up beside his.

  It was an easy to place to find. Horseshoe Lake was a popular attraction for swimming and camping to anyone within a hundred mile radius. And Anthony, having gone up ahead to set get up, had given my name to the guy at the lodge for check in. The man promptly produced a map, marked off where Anthony’s site was, and sent us on our way. Jackson was bouncing in his seat with his excitement. Of course, when I saw how excited he was, I instantly felt guilty for not having thought to do this before.

  “It wasn’t too hard. And Reggie up at the lodge was very helpful with pointing out where to go.” Anthony was approaching us as we got out of the car.

  “Reggie huh?” Anthony walked over to stand beside the trunk of my car.

  I shrugged. “That’s how he introduced himself.” And then I noticed that he was staring at me. “What?”

  Anthony shook his head. “Nothing, it’s just that I think this is the first time I’ve seen you wear something besides a suit.”

  I looked down at my cargo shorts and t-shirt and cocked my head to the side. “You’re wearing pretty much the same thing.”